My Autobiography as a Teacher
I would like to start
this reflection with a reflective question: How do I become a teacher? And I
express “become” because “teaching is an act that once started is never over”
(Danielewicz 2001, 16). This complex question make me think about all the
experiences I have had related with teaching and learning. In this sense, I
consider the notion of identity development addressed by Danielewicz in her
book Teaching Selves. As she mentions being a teacher is a question of identity
as a “teacher” and identity could be considered as how I perceive myself and
others and how others perceive themselves and me. Consequently, as perceptions
can change identity can also do it, and this is what is called in Danielewicz
terms “identity development”. In this way, she considers that becoming a
teacher is a question of identity development as a teacher. It is more than a
simple role, it is to be identified as teacher by myself and others.
According to this, I
could answer my question of how I become a teacher from a perspective of
identity development. First of all, it is important to highlight that I never
perceived myself as a teacher, even as a musician but not as a teacher. When I
finished high school I did not know even what I was going to study - and even
now I am constantly questioning about what am I going to be in life – I choose
Electronic Engineering because it was similar to System Engineering and it was
one of the programs that required more Saber scores in order to enter to it.
However, I was not prepared in maths terms for an engineering program and the
only subject that I was really good was at English. So, I decided to apply for
the ELT Program to try. Although I was afraid of English (as once I won a
spelling contest at school and then I was invited to the Spelling Bee La
Fragua, and I listen to people talking in English and I did not understand
almost anything) I could deal satisfactorily with my classes and finish the ELT
program.
Secondly, it is
important to highlight that identity construction is linked with the discourse
and context in which the individual is involved. In this regard, I consider
that my identity as a teacher has been shaped by the different experiences I
have had along my life. As a student, I have learnt what kind of teacher I
would like to have in my classes, and as a teacher I have learnt how I would
like my students to be. Consequently, I consider both sides as I have been in
the two sides. This is really relevant because I consider that in class there
is a need for a essential connection between the teacher and the students and
these kind of experiences have made me gain insights in that kind of
relationship. As Danielewicz (2001) have mentioned “Some teachers impress us
deeply” (p.1) As a result, I reflect on what is essential for teaching and what
is not and make my own judgment and take what is relevant for me to apply it.
Now I would like to
reflect upon this question: Who am I as a teacher? I could approach this
question from two perspectives: The identity or perceptions others have about
me as teacher and my own identity (how I perceive myself as a teacher). In this
order, when I usually start a course I like the idea (as Danielewicz does) of
knowing my students lacks, wants and expectations for the course. I personally
consider that teaching needs to be contextualized in order to be more
meaningful for the students. In this way, I usually try to adapt the most the
course to the students’ personalities and interests. In this same sense, at the
end of the course I usually ask them to write in a piece of paper what their
feelings are and their reactions for the class. This is, what they like and
dislike of the class and the teacher and why. In this path, I collect all these
kind of farewell letters and read it alone. I do not force them to write their
names. I just ask them to be polite and sincere. As a result of this, I usually
find in their notes that they like the class. Some of them highlight my energy
as a teacher as I try to be charismatic and enthusiastic with the class, and we
usually make jokes and have a lot of fun in class while learning. Therefore, a
principal description they make of me is that I am a funny teacher, that I am
different as other teachers are “embittered”. Yesterday, I received a message
of a student from another town that I gave classes to her last year. I was
really impressed when I read that I had inspired her to be better, that even I
always taught them values. She said that I was a different teacher in the sense
that I went beyond the classroom and helped them to understand life. I say I
was impressed because I never devoted a whole class to promote values or
reflection about life. However, I realized that she said that because when they
made mistakes I encouraged them to fix them and I told them that they could do
it and they finally did it. Thus, I realized that sometimes you do not know how
many people you are inspiring until they tell you or someone else. That was the
case of a friend of mine who has departed. Only when he died, his brother told
me that “He wanted to be like me” (in musical terms) and I was surprised as I
never expect I was inspiring him. As a result of this, I decided to create and
event at school called “Newman Fest” and we have celebrated it twice in
different towns.
Therefore, I would like
to express that I was not aware of some of the perceptions the students have on
me. As for example, the kind of things you teach unconsciously because of your
own beliefs and personality. I think I know myself as a person and as a
teacher, and I say I think because everything is in constantly change as
identity. Thus, I could be once again surprised when someone else make me
noticed something I am, but I was not aware of it. However, to finish I
perceive myself as the teacher I would like to have, and maybe this is the
reason why most of the students like my classes. I always say “it’s better to
learn in a funny way”. After, teaching I discovered I like it. Now, I am in the
Master in ELT and I let the destiny to impress me. J
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